Late Summer Gardens

Sometimes at this time of year I pull into the driveway and think: "Ugh." What must the neighbors think? The cupplant are beginning to brown, towering above the rest of the garden beds. Most of the flowers have given up their blooms. Various plants are dying back, setting seeds, and generally not putting on the best show. This is when I have to stop and remind myself that this is one of my favorite times of year in the gardens.
Those dried cupplant heads attract my beloved goldfinches. The finches stop throughout the summer, checking to see if their coveted seeds are ready yet, knowing our yard will provide a smorgasbord when they are. Now we hear the finches from everywhere in the yard, chattering as they feast. There's one little lady in particular that steals my heart. Yes, one. There's no doubt who she is when she arrives. She's cheeky as can be and she prefers some of the seeds that are setting in one of the forest garden beds near the rain barrels. When I water from the barrel, she scolds me until I leave the premises. She gets more daring each week. Today when I decided to try to get a shot of her, she let me within 3 to 4 feet before flying to a further perch and scolding me heartily. Her mate has begun his transition into fall coloring, and is a lovely shade of lime green.

The prairie beds, rain gardens, and spent vegetable beds all buzz with pollinators that find our yard to be an oasis as gardens start to die back. Our asters, butterfly weed, and even traditional garden plants like sunflowers, butterfly bush and russian sage all attract visitors. I watched a female hummingbird at the russian sage and sweet peas for a solid 10 minutes today. In the summer, they only visit for a few seconds at a time. The spiders love the visitors as well. As little love as I have for arachnids, I have to admit their particular stark beauty. The yellow and black arigopes are the most prominent, with their zig zag down the middle of their web to support their bulk. It's always a bit of a shock to come across one in the gardens, so you have to step carefully, knowing they're quite abundant. We have a variety of crawlers, and they decorate the spaces in-between the plants throughout the yard.

It's amazing what you find when you take a few moments to just poke around. We haven't spotted a single monarch caterpillar this year. Usually we have dozens in the gardens, but the butterflies have been few and far between this year. In my quest to find one yesterday, I came across this beautiful imperial moth caterpillar in our sycamores that dot the back prairie bed. He'll be heading underground soon to pupate.

As the garden beds slow down and surrender the last of their fruits, I almost forget to look up and remember that we're just weeks away from the trees' contribution to our harvest. A few tiny apples and some lovely asian pears are shadowed this year by our big pear trees. They had hundreds of buds this year and are boasting impressive fruits now.

It's a busy time of year, and it helps to remember that though our suburban neighbors may shake their heads, we are hosting a whole amazing ecosystem right outside our door. Enjoy these last beautiful days of summer.

For a closer look at any of the pictures, just click. Enjoy!

Groupon's "Save the Money" Commercials

Once a year our family goes in for a night of being a "normal" American family and watches the superbowl together. None of us are into football at all, but we have fun cheering along with millions of those who are around the world, gnoshing on goodies and best of all, watching the commercials. I admit I don't have the toughest skin, and there were a few moments in multiple commercials that I found tasteless. But when Groupon's Tibet themed ad came on, I had a naive moment of thinking that the ICT had actually raised enough money to run a superbowl commercial, which quickly turned into having my jaw drop when it turned into a "ha ha" moment for Groupon. My husband and I were both shocked that a company would take something as serious as the atrocities of Tibet and try to make a joke out of it. We logged onto Facebook to see the potential fallout. While encouraged that there was some, we wished there was more. Plenty of people were posting to bash the "hippies" (there was much worse name calling going on) who were offended. I tried to take a moment to analyze my feelings about the commercial. After sleeping on it and watching it along with Groupon's other commercials, I've decided that my initial reaction was sound. Quite simply, using a situation where we have seen a generation of murder, rape, religious oppression, and exile to make a joke is tasteless in the extreme. I've seen bloggers this morning defending Groupon as having been making a joke about themselves--being self deprecating by admitting that it's about money and nothing more. I don't see how that excuses the situation. Once again, it seems that the only way to try to get people to understand why it is offensive is to beg the comparison of something that would be significant to them. Can you imagine a company trying to get away with making light of something that the majority of Americans hold sacred? Would Groupon have ever even considered starting a commercial with the tragedies of 9/11 and then turning it into a joke about getting cheap New York pizza? Absolutely not. Yet they exploited an equally tragic situation because it was removed enough from the American psyche for them to get away with it.

Perhaps the saddest part of all of this for me is the opportunity it has created for the division of our country to play itself out on yet another canvas. Go to Groupon's Facebook page or any of the blogs where people are commenting, and you'll see people ripping apart those condemning Groupon. Thankfully as of early this morning there wasn't too much acknowledgement of those barbs, but there was some mud slinging back and forth. There is a definite air from those not offended of "Why should I care?". Mostly it's all just name calling and cries of "It's just advertising!" Again, I would challenge those defenders of Groupon to imagine a similar commercial with something that is dear to their heart. How about a joke ad about Hurricane Katrina's devastation that turns into a funny bit about saving money at a hardware store? Or maybe poking fun at our men and women in uniform who are in the line of fire and then turning into a laugh about cheap airline tickets? The point is that with this method of advertising, Groupon is capitalizing on our propensity that already exists to turn a blind eye to issues that we can easily forget about. These are issues that are easy for Americans to forget about--to think it doesn't affect us because it's not our backyard. Groupon is giving a nudge and a wink to things that we should be ashamed to be brushing aside as "not my problem". It's truly shameful.

Groupon's only saving grace is their "Save the Money" site where the ads are posted along with buttons where people can donate to related charities for each of the issues that Groupon is mocking: currently commercial whaling, rainforest deforestation, and Tibet. (All very funny issues, right?) For the Greenpeace donation, Groupon will give you a $15 credit for a $15 donation. Groupon is also matching donations to the organization they chose: "The Tibet Fund", up to $100,000. That's nice, sure, but does it really make up for exploiting gross human rights violations for advertising? I find it almost equally offensive that they feel that throwing a "donate" button up under the commercial makes up for their tasteless ads. There is some information from The Tibet Fund on the option to purchase the $15 donation for them. At this point I think Groupon should at the very least make a bigger deal about encouraging people to learn about the issues in Tibet. At the time of this post 1,667 people have purchased the donation to Greenpeace (getting $15 back in Groupon credit). Only 47 have purchased the Tibet donation. I myself wouldn't purchase it because it feels like condoning the ad. Until Groupon ups the ante in repairing this colossal blunder I'll be canceling my Groupon account (which they've made very difficult to do) and continuing to ask people to pay attention to things like these ads that are encouraging us to forget about everyone else's problems in favor of lining our own nests. While I would love to see an apology from Groupon, I'm learning to tone down my naivete.

Strange Times

My head has been in a very strange place lately. I seem to be at a precipice, but I haven't decided yet what the significance is. As a firm believer in what I refer to as the "Divine Nudge", I try to be open to feelings which urge me to sway one way or another--change direction, or make a certain decision. But as I have sat in this new mindset for a few days, I'm beginning to believe that I've just reached a point where I am open to making that change or taking that big step at any time, not just the "right" time, where there may be a critical choice to be made.


Maybe I should back up and try to explain a bit where I'm at. I've been feeling a bit burned out in the previous few months. I've been in my current field for about five years now, and I love my organization, but I feel like there is more I could be doing. I don't feel as called to it as I once did. I've been able to cut my hours back and still get the job done though, and spending less hours has been helpful in allowing me to step back yet continue to meet the needs of my organization.

Local, organic food is a bigger passion, but that too has seemed to loom as more responsibility than I can keep up with. I've enjoyed our home gardens more this year though, particularly as we have established relationships with local outlets that want our produce. There is nothing like growing your own food, and extending that to sharing it with others. The cool season has made growing slow, which has been nice as we haven't been overwhelmed as much as last year with weeds, haven't had to fight flooded fields, etc. The gardens have been just right--a source of food but also of solace and respite from the busy day-to-day.


The kids have been doing activities almost every morning, but I have them in the afternoons, and have struck a good balance I think between "doing" with them, and just letting them be. We have our beach days, and we have our days where they splash around in the backyard while I chill out with a book or putz in the gardens.


So that's where I've been, and then Rob took a week off of work last week, and before that I had a few days with my family visiting. The kids had off of their activities, and we didn't plan a million things to do, so it was just spending time with family, visiting bookstores or the farmer's market--just living life. It seems weird to say that it was just a week--maybe 10 days. It felt like much more. I felt so relaxed and at peace with everything, but as the days went by, I started noticing some strange things.


First, I started listening to different music. I's been listening to a lot of my typical workout music all the time now, to the point that Bird was starting to sing along with Lady Gaga and the Black Eyed Peas a bit more than I was comfortable with! Then I got the new Regina Spektor album, which was a change since I normally just buy a select song here and there, and somehow it allowed me to get into this very internal mindset. I went back to my more mellow music, it just feel right again.


I think the strangest thing though has been books. I am an avid reader, and "have" to have a good novel on my bedside table to read myself to sleep. I rarely read for pleasure outside of that bedtime window, but at the beginning of this little mini-vacation I spent much of a day reading a novel I'd picked up from the library. It wasn't particularly fabulous, but a nice pleasant read. When I finished it, it was too late to go to the library but I needed something to read at bed, so I went to our bookshelves and grabbed the last Harry Potter. I am usually someone who has to finish what they start readig, but I have a few select books that I have read enough times that I'm okay with just reading a bit in-between other books. So the next day I looked at some of the "best of" summer reading lists, and couldn't find anything that appealed to me. I went to the bookstore, and looked at dozens of books, but nothing called to me. Another bookstore--same thing, and another... Then I went to the library and experienced the same phemomenon. You have to understand, this has never happened to me before. Yes, I'm picky about books, but I've always found something I want to read. I spent about 30 minutes staring at the spines of the books on the shelves in the non-fiction section pondering this. Perhaps it's because my normal reads are escapist--sci-fi, fantasy, historical fiction--and something in me is rejecting that as I get closer to--what, reality? But that can't be all there is to it, because not even my beloved non-fiction appeals right now. I left the library with a copy of Vegan with a Vengance (an old friend) just because it felt ridiculous not to check out something.

Maybe it's not just reality that I've discovered, but somehow managed to find that near-enlightenment of living in the present. Having no work responsibilities, having Rob home (and really home, not able to go to the farm to work because of a shoulder injury), not planning any grand trips or adventures, having the kids home and happy... I've done plenty of thinking about where I want to be eventually. Should I get my Masters in Non-Profit Management? Should we look for a farm here, or closer to my parents? Should I try to find a job with more hours but less responsibility? I've thought about how the reason we're all so stressed is that we fill our lives with STUFF, and then we stress about keeping up with all of the STUFF in our big houses that we don't have time to clean, and we're not happy so we work harder so we have more money to buy more STUFF... But I haven't stressed out about it, it's just passed through as a truth. Is it as simple as coming to terms with the present? Carpe diem? I feel disconnected from all of the normal stress, all of the worries. It's like I'm somehow floating above the currents that I was previously constantly caught in. I'm curious, especially to see what happens next, but not so much that I'm stressing about it. I'm just...living. And really enjoying it.

Just Sayin'

And now, for something completely different!

One Tribe
Black Eyed Peas--The E.N.D.

Lyrics -- best I could do tonight, forgive my mistakes and lack of proper repeats!

One Tribe, one time, one planet, one race
It's all one blood don't care about your face
Color of your eye or the tone of your skin
Don't care where you are, don't care where you been

'Cause where we gonna go, is where we wanna be
The place where the native language is unity
And the continent is called Pangea
And the main ideas are connected like a sphere

No propaganda to try to upperhand us
'Cause man I'm lovin' this peace,
Man I'm loving this peace
Man I'm loving this peace

I don't need no leader that's gonna force feed a
concept to make me think I need ta
fear my brother, and fear my sister
and shoot my neighbor with my big missile

If I had an enemy, enemy
If I had an enemy, enemy
If I had an enemy then my enemy's
gonna try to come an' kill me
cause I'm his enemy.

There's One Tribe y'all
One Tribe y'all
We are one people
Let's cast amnesia
forget about all that evil
all that evil that they feed ya
remember we are one people
We are one people

One Tribe, one time, one planet, one race
One love one people, one
Too many things that's causin' one
to forget about the main cause

Connecting, uniting, but the evil
is seeded and alive in us
So our weapons are collidin',
and our peace is sinkin' like Poseidon

But we know that the one
the evil one is threatened by the sum
so he come and try to separate the sum
But he dumb

He didn't know we had a way to overcome
rejuvanatin' by the beating of the drum
come together by the supper of the hum
Freedom when all become one, forever.

It's One Tribe y'all
One Tribe y'all
We are one people
Let's cast amnesia
forget about all that evil
all that evil that they feed ya
Remember we are one people
We are one people

One love, one blood, one people
One heart, one beat, we equal
Connected like the internet
United that's how we do

Let's break one soul we situ
Let love and peace lead you
We can overcome the complication
cause we need to

Help eachother make these changes
Brother Sister rearrange this
We are fakin but we can change this
bad condition break

Use your mind and not your greed
Let's connect and help proceed
This is something I believe
We are one, we're all just people.

One Tribe y'all
One Tribe y'all
We are one people
Let's cast amnesia
forget about all that evil
all that evil that they feed ya
remember we are one people
We are one people
One Tribe y'all
One People

Lord help me out
trying to figure out what it's all about
'cause we're one and the same
same choice, same pain

And I hope that you get what I need ya
'cause maybe we need amnesia
and I don't wanna sound like a preacher
but we need ta be one

One war, one love, one passion
One tribe one understanding
cause you and me can
become one
***
New album is out--check it out!

The Future of Hope

Last night, when we heard Robert Siegel of NPR say it for the first time, we hung this second banner next to our Hope banner that's been up for a while now. We hung the banner as we cried tears of joy, as we laughed with disbelief, as we made a champagne toast to the future, as we hung blue crepe paper throughout the kitchen and the deck. We woke up Sprout and Bird, and carried our sleepy eyed children down as we turned on the TV and watched President Elect Barack Obama take the stage in Grant Park, and tell us that our hope has NOT been in vain. We watched over and over again this video, and sang along, and laughed and cried some more. Thank you voters. Thank you America, for standing up to make your voice heard. Thank you for believing, for hoping, for dreaming, and making a better tomorrow, a reality. I am so hopeful, so proud, and I stand with you today and share the dreams for the future, that now seem brighter than ever! YES WE CAN!!!

The Apron Strings

The introduction of Sarah Palin into the current political mess has sparked a flood of talk about feminism in America. Frankly, I haven't heard a single political comment about Palin and feminism that I agree with. I heard an article on NPR about Palin a few months ago, and she struck me as a strong, powerful woman. Still, I was shocked at McCain's choice of a running mate with so little experience. I cringed at what seemed obvious: He was gunning for Clinton supporters. There have been so many cringe-worthy moments since that initial announcement.
One thing that's driving me crazy is the people saying that they are going to vote for Palin because the "talking heads" are saying she shouldn't run for Vice President because she's a mom. Moms are great, they say. Moms can do anything. Well trust me, I know that most Moms are superheroes. Even Palin has donned this pitbull-with-lipstick-hockey-mom image with pride. But frankly, I have a real problem with the "I'm a mom just like you." line of thought. I want an individual who isn't all that much like me, frankly. I have some major ideas about government, but do I think I'm qualified to run the country? Heck no. And frankly I cringe at the fact that these self professed "feminists" say they are voting for Palin because the powers-that-be say she can't do it, or because Palin is a Mom. Shouldn't we empowered women be intelligent enough to realize when someone is chosen based on their gender? Palin may be a strong woman, but the idea that she is qualified for VP is outrageous. Shouldn't we expect more from our politicians than this?

Amidst all of the gender talk, I keep hearing the term "Apron Strings". They say Palin is tying on the apron strings with pride. (Some say this against Palin, some for Palin.) They play clips of conservative analysts accusing Hillary of "hiding behind the apron strings". Outside of politics, people accuse people who stay close to their mother's as "holding on to" the apron strings. I recently became the proud owner of an apron, so maybe that's what made these comments stick out to me. What does that mean, apron strings? In context, people seem to think it represents feminine, stay-at-home, dinner-on-the-table womanhood. Are strong women "hiding" their strength behind femininty? If so, apron strings are the wrong way to go about portraying this. As I was tying on my apron the other day, I realized something. Apron strings are designed to cross in back, and tie in front. Why? Because while we women are going about our business, there is no one standing around waiting to help us out. There is no one there to tie the strings of our aprons so we can keep our dresses clean. No, we tie our apron strings ourselves, and get down to the business of doing all of the hard work that--while behind the scenes--is so crucial to keeping everything running as it should.

My youngest started school last week. I have been a proud stay-at-home-mom (SAHM) for nearly seven years now, so this was a huge change. People kept telling me I would have "so much time" now, but I couldn't believe it. Indeed, I seem just as busy now as I was before. I still have two non-profits to Direct, a gardening business to co-operate, a house to keep, 3 dogs to care for, and 2 kids that now not only need much more of my attention when they are here, but need to be shuttled back and forth to school and have all sorts of new needs because of school. People used to tell me I was a superwoman, and I shook my head. But now I look back and wonder how I managed it all. I don't often pat my own back, but I'm doing it now in hopes that some of my readers will acknowledge their own superhero status as well, and wear their self-tied aprons with pride.

Sweet retro apron by Pretty Industries--ampirlot on Etsy.com.

Catching Up

It has been far too long since I've posted--so long that I don't think I can possibly catch up. So since a picture is worth a thousand words, here is what I did this summer.
Any questions? I hope to be back to normal speed blogging very soon. Hope you all had a wonderful summer!

A Watery Glimpse of the Future?

Some of my dear readers have been wondering how we're doing here in Wisconsin with all of the flooding. Before I begin, let me say that we are fine. We are 1000 times luckier than the majority of people in our area. Our basement is dry, we can not complain. We have had some major damage to our seed crops and lettuce, and our vegetables that survived are overgrown with weeds in fields so soggy we can't possibly step foot in them without damaging the plants. So. We've done what we could. We did two huge lettuce harvests before hail took the remainder that we couldn't get out in time. The refrigerator was overflowing with lettuce. Think I'm exaggerating? That's where you'd be wrong. I have photographic evidence! So that and a car with a few hail dings is really all we can claim as inconvenience. That--and being relatively stranded. We live very near the Rock River. Most of you know we live right up against I-94. Half of it has been closed because of flooding on the Rock. We basically can't get West with any rhyme or reason. We can't get South either without going way east first. We can go North, but not far, and not to any practical purpose. We can easily go East, we just can't get back. The first picture up above shows the Rock River 3 days before we got the last set of really big storms--3 nights before we spent most of the night in our basement listening to tornado sirens go off. We've seen the Rock flood it's banks a bit at this farm before--the normal path is a few yards to the right of the line of trees on the right of the picture. It's crept into this farmyard a bit before, but nothing like this. If you look at the fenceline, you'll see that it's under about 3 feet of water. Now this picture is of the park directly across the water. There is usually a parking lot in front of that sign. (It's still there, just under a couple of feet of water. Notice the picnic pavilion that's barely above water. Now. Like I said, this was three days before the last big wave of storms hit. The day after the storms hit, we were driving home from the North and the bridge was closed. This pavilion? Was 3 feet deep in water. And then? It rained again. A lot. So we can't even get onto this road anymore but I can only imagine what it looks like now. And the farm on the other side--the water has to be up over the ground floor level of that house now. I'd guess their first floor is under at least a foot of water. The water just keeps coming, and there is nowhere for it to go. It is bizarre to be stranded like this. Events are being canceled left and right, local business is suffering since most people are avoiding the interstate, and you just "can't get from here to there" as someone reminisced is once true again. This is all bad--but nothing compared to what's happening in Iowa. The scariest part is that this may very well be just a glimpse of the future as we experience continued climate change, AKA global warming. In other news Sprout graduated from Kindergarten and our little bird turns 5. The world keeps turning on, regardless of climate change, regardless of the rain. It helps a little to know that hopefully our kids will grow up in a brighter future if we all do our part to stop and reverse the changes that past generations have put into motion. As Beo says, and it is more important than ever now: Be the change.

The Branch Will Not Break

Lately life has been quite busy, yet has seemed more balanced at the same time. As I've had this realization, I've found that I'm more susceptible to being touched by poetry. Maybe it's just that it's National Poetry Month. I heard this poem on "To The Best of Our Knowledge" (NPR) last weekend and found it positively delightful:

In a pine tree,
A few yards away from my window sill,
A brilliant blue jay is springing up and down,
up and down,
On a branch.
I laugh, as I see him abandon himself
To entire delight, for he knows as well as I do
That the branch will not break.
--James Wright

I so loved this poem, and actually the entire show was just really excellent. As a matter of fact, you should listen to it if you have the time. You can do so HERE. It sent me chasing to Barnes and Noble for the book "Sightings" by Sam Keen, and I decided to see if I could find the book that the poem was in. It was only $5, so heck yeah, throw it in there. I ordered those two books along with SMITH magazine's "Not Quite What I Was Planning" (a blog for a later date). These books are so good that I sent the exact same order to my sister and her roomie because they needed them. Well, the books came, and the poetry book was just twee! At first I felt like an idiot, but then I realized that it was all poetry in motion,

because Goodreau Privera had just arrived and looked so sweet sitting in her chair, but really needed some reading material. Hello, how cute is this? Ah yes, my doll collecting has branched out a bit since last I mentioned it. I'm more into them now, but into different dolls. Beo surprised me with some mad money from an unexpected bonus, so I got to make the jump and purchase this Beauty. Seriously, isn't she gorgeous? It's silly how happy she makes me.

Balance in the doing,
In the music and the craft.
Creativity and Hard Work,
Challenge and Longing.
Accomplishment and sometimes,
sheer unexpected joy:
A laugh
A smile
A song
And I know that I am blessed.

Happy Poetry Month!

Ebullience

My daughter, she is ebullient. Bird has always been a spirited child, but she just never ceases to amaze me. With the spring thaw, her spirits have been rising with each inch of grass that's revealed degree by degree. For days now, she'll point out the window saying "Look, look!" as if there was some incredible wonder out our own back door. When we ask what she sees, she says: "Grass!", and she's truly thrilled, just glowing.

The other day, she heard an NPR DJ say "Obama", and said: "Mommy, they said Obama!" and I said: "Who is Obama?" Bird started singing "Yes-we-can, Yes-we-can, oh Yes-we-can!" So I asked her, "We can what?" She stopped and said she didn't know, so I told her that that song about Obama was saying that Yes, we can make the world a better place. Well that just set her off into her own version:

Yes-we-can make the world a better place! Yes-we-can give food to puppies and kitties! Yes-we-can make the wars stop and the soldiers stop fighting! Yes-we-can see a robin because it's almost spring! Yes-we-can stop global warming! Yes-we-can turn off lights to help!

How can you not just adore this kid? You can't not adore her, that's all there is too it. She is just full of joy and love, and is all about spreading it around. You rarely see this kid without a smile on her face. Just now, I hear her saying: "Wow, this is so amazing! This is just SO beautiful..." so I peek in her room, and she's looking out the window. "What is it, Bird?", I asked. "The world." said she.

We could all learn a lesson from my Bird. I know I'm blessed to have the opportunity every day.

The Cold

I love living in Wisconsin. Really, I do. Sure, I wish that we lived closer to family, but all in all I really love the little corner of Wisconsin we've found as our home. Right now though? I'm so done with Wisconsin Winter. This winter has been downright bizarre. We got a lot of snow early on, but it all but melted right before Christmas. This past month we had two weeks where it was below freezing (without the windchill) nearly every day. I went to a rare ladies evening a couple of weekends ago, and we sat outside in the hot tub while the -6 degree air blew around us. Ironically, hat's been about the only time I've felt warm in the past couple of months. We actually keep the thermostat at a relatively reasonable spot. The upstairs, where I do most of my work, does get cold since our thermostat is located downstairs in the sunny living room. Rob feels badly for me, and bought me an energy efficient space heater that I keep about 4 inches away from my chair when I'm going to be in my room for a while. I wear layers, thick sweaters usually, but unless I add a hat and a throw, I still feel cold. I bought UGGS in the hope that they would keep my feet warm, but it didn't make a difference. Cold like this is just permeating. It seeps through the windows (literally) and into my mood as well. We had a brief respite this weekend. It crept into the 20s on Sunday, so we went snowshoeing. Monday morning was even warmer so I went for a run. It was only my second of the year. With temperatures what they've been and 6 weeks of pneumonia behind me, I don't want to tempt fate. It felt so good to be able to get outside and get a good run in. I think that will be part of my routine once both Sprout and Bird are in school. This morning it was over 40! It wasn't to last though, we are supposed to drop below zero by this evening. School was called off early with the nasty weather approaching. Apparently people who watch TV knew that, so Sprout was only one of a few kids who was still there when I got the call that I should have picked him up a half hour before. Talk about one of those "bad mom" feelings. Poor guy. I couldn't figure out how people were supposed to know until Rob reminded me of TVs. Oh yeah... Anyway, my sister has been updating me on their temps in Fairbanks. They have been dealing with -30+ without windchill. She says when it drops to -50, brakes stop working. So I will take Wisconsin as cheerfully as I can manage, even with all of the crazy weather that global climate change is bringing the badger state. It's nothing a good hat, a thick sweater, some capilene baselayers, fleece socks, a space heater, hot tea, a blanket and a steaming bowl of soup won't fix.

Looking Forward-2008

I start this post and I take a deep breath. This year holds so much in it. I read last year's new year post, and I try to think about what has changed. My many blessings are for the most part still in place. My Dad is healthy, we have the luxury to live a sustainable lifestlye in our community, and I have a wonderful family. I've lost a dog, added a job, and let's face it, a few of those lost pounds back. Well, nothing stays the same.

2008 is going to be back to basics for me. Someday Gardens took a lot of time last year, and it's bound to take even more this year. My workload with my paid job has doubled, and it's going to be a rather big year with lots of responsibilities there. If I weren't so passionate about interfaith volunteer caregiving, I would quit, and find a way to do without that income. As it stands, I feel called to continue my work. Somehow though, I need to be able to balance those responsibilities with the other things that matter.

I want to get back to cooking more often. Yes, there's convenience food out there that's organic, but with all of the extra packaging, expense and the added fat and calories, there are lots of drawbacks there. It will still be around as an occasional fall-back, but cooking has to take priority again.

I want to spend more time just doing little things with the kids--reading, playing, gardening, hiking, but giving them my full attention. Bird will start school this year, and it's going to be such a huge change. I want to give her my time while I still have so much more with her, and make sure I take advantage of the time I'll have with Sprout this summer. Public school is as hard as we thought it would be, and if I want to continue to have them hold our values dear, I need to exemplify that and be there with them to drive it home.

With the extra income from my second job, our budget got a little loose. Everyone gets one new outfit a season, tops. Material accumulation needs to get checked. We cut the kids off from their occasional new toy in early Fall, and it made their holiday gifts a lot more exciting. I want to stick with that this year. We need to cut back on eating out and coffee out and focus on saving up for our Someday.

I have to take time for me too, but healthy time. Knitting, reading, gardening, have all fallen by the wayside as I find myself stressed out with work-related tasks. With the elections coming up, I know I'll want to get involved with politics again, and I want to make time for that. I did get a lot of canning done in '07, but I hope to shoot for even more this year.

It's a lot, and it's rather nebulous, but I don't find it overwhelming. I think I'll be happier once I feel that I'm back on track. Right now I tend to just get overwhelmed with work and zonk out from things like relaxing with the kids, knitting, cooking. Yes, those things take time, but they're the things that I value, the things that make me happy, and I think I'll feel clearer once I refocus. I wish you and yours peace of mind and happiness in the year to come.

100th Post

Happy Earth Day! This is my 100th post. Yep, it is. I thought I'd show you a number of different things for this momentous occasion. Here's some things growing in our yard. Here's our great groundcover:

Here's one of the native plants in our shade garden: Beo's latest rock wall: Here are the flowers I got at the Farmer's Market Saturday:

Here's my little beauty and my big dopey hound:

Here's me really, really happy that Beo felt 100 posts deserved a new camera! (Actually the 100 thing was a bonus to the fact that Beo got a bonus at work and has secretly been planning to get me this. What do I call him in my profile? Enviable? Yes, I think that's apt!)

Threadless T-Shirts

This is one of those completely-off-my-normal-beaten-path things. I recently discovered Threadless.com through Groovy Green. This is a website that lets designers submit ideas for t-shirts, and some get printed and are available for purchase. The t-shirt designs are so independent and different. I have enjoyed just flipping through the various submissions. I'm a sucker for tees but have way too many. The kids on the other hand, could use a couple of new ones. I love that these designs really let them march to their own drummer. (A few of their favorites along with some of mine are pictured above.) The original post on Groovy Green pointed out some cool Eco-submissions. The tees aren't organic but they're printed mostly on American Apparel-not necessarily the savoriest company, but at least sweat free. Threadless is having a $10 sale right now, so check it out!

Resolution Check-In

It's March 1st-2007 is racing right along. Did you make any resolutions? Have they survived the first couple months of the year? I am reasonably happy with how my focus areas for 2007 are going. My main goals were to be more frugal, especially with food; to buy 50% of the kids clothes used, to be more resourceful, and to eliminate credit card spending. This is all about simplicity and sustainability.

Frugality and Food is going well. Our grocery budget for this year is already $100 less a month than 2006, and we've finished January and February with $100+ left in those budgets. We've done this sticking to local, organic, and low packaging. Make sure to check out my posts on frugality if you haven't already. I'm really amazed at how much further we've been able to cut back, even being 99% organic.

Things with the kids clothes are overall going well. Right now both kids have a solid half of their clothes second-hand. I confess that it has still been a real struggle for me to regulate my buying habits, however I have done much better than in the past. I have also been vindicated in my belief that quality counts. Sprout recently wore clean through a pair of pants and is on his way through another--his last 2 pair of, let's face it, sweatshop eco-disaster pants from a big chain. The ones from quality eco-friendly and socially conscious places are still going strong with barely a sign of wear, even though they've been through just as much.

In keeping with working with what we have-talents and skill included, I'm knitting an Easter cardigan for Bird rather than purchasing one. I don't do dainty, but it will be fun and cozy for one of my favorite celebrations of Spring. She may only be 3, but she already seems very excited about the fact that I'm making something for her to wear. I've been making decent progress, knitting as I watch documentaries (a recent habit), and should have it done on time.

Our credit card spending has improved dramatically. We are down a very decent amount for the year. We have used the cards a couple of times but they have so far all gotten paid off quickly and we've stayed far ahead of the game, enough so that Beo and I have decided to use a bit of our tax refund so that he can accompany me to a meeting I'm going to in warmer climes. It will be a much needed vacation for him, and we'll have a bit more time than usual to spend together.

It hasn't been all sunshine and roses, there have been slip-ups along the way, but we've kept working towards our goals and I feel proud to keep moving in the right direction and holding to the values I want to stick with this year. If you've fallen off your own bandwagon, don't forget that it's yours to stop when you need to. Pick yourself up, brush off, and climb right back on. If I hadn't done the same, I'd be in a cloud of dust myself.

Tough Talk-Shopping Addictions

I've mentioned my love of kids clothes in the past. I probably haven't been real candid about how out of control that "love" has gotten in the past. It's not real fun to talk about, but here goes.
A couple of years ago, I truly became a shopping addict, going way out my comfort zone in terms of what I was buying and how much I was spending. I spent a couple thousand dollars on a big name brand clothing company, buying clothes that didn't fit our lifestyle from a company I didn't want to support. This wasn't "me" at all. I always swore that my kids would wear plain t-shirts, hand tie-dyed of course, and hand-me-down jeans. By the time I realized how bad I'd gotten, Bird had over 30 outfits. Halfway through my "recovery", Beo walked into Bird's closet, saw her nine pairs of shoes, and got more serious about my problem. I know he worried about me, but with me being in control of the finances, and having all sorts of great justifications, I'm sure he felt reluctant to get too wrapped up in it.

What is it that made me so crazy about these clothes? It was so out of control. Sometimes when there was a big sale rumored, I'd drive over 100 miles to hit both store in our area. I would buy something, then end up feeling terrible about it, and sell it in a storm of guilt. For a while, I made myself feel better by looking at how I wasn't as bad as "the others". In one of my online recovery groups there were women hiding huge boxes of clothes in their attics, lying to their husbands, secretly spending savings and maxing out credit cards, and even going into bankrupcy, all for these clothes. We talked about how having our kids so well dressed somehow validated our lives as Stay-at-Home-Moms. There were work-for-pay Moms too though, and I think they thought the same thing-that having well dressed kids meant that they were good Moms even though they couldn't stay-at-home. There may have been some of that "Good Mom" validation for me, but I think a big part of it was that I just plain loved the clothes, and how good the kids looked in them. I loved getting something lovely and new in the mail, washing it, hanging it in the closet. I loved going through the many outfits. At the core though, it wasn't healthy. I think it's okay to have a guilty pleasure, but when it starts making you compromise your values, live outside your means, and make questionable judgements, it's time to step back. A lot of times I'd catch myself shopping when I was going through a depressed period, or stress. Buying something made me feel better. Finally, about this time last year, I got fed up with myself and called it quits. I've only made one purchase from "them" since. That doesn't mean it's been smooth sailing though.

I switched my loyalty to a company I believed in, which was a good start. Hanna Andersson is a wonderful company-dedicated to social responsiblity. They believe in being environmentally conscious, and offer organic clothing options as well as Eco-Tex clothing. It's been tough for me not to let the allure of supporting a company I believe in get me back into my old buying habits. I'm definitely improving, in 2006 spending about 1/3 of what I did the previous year, but I'd like to do even better. I've vowed to get half of this years clothes second-hand, returning to my environmental values. I've set a strict budget for myself, allowing myself $40 a month for kids clothes, plus whatever I can get for resale values on last years clothes. To you, it might sound like plenty. To me, I feel like it's barely enough. Today when I noticed that Sprout had outgrown yet another pair of shoes, I immediately thought to order another pair. I had to stop myself to remind myself that one pair of shoes could be enough. As I go through the kids clothes for Spring, I have to ask Beo for help in decision making at every turn, because I'm so scared of making a wrong turn. So far though, I've done well. We're getting ahead instead of behind on our budget goals, and I've resisted many a siren call.

The whole shebang is so unlike me. Some of our friends laughed when I told them about it, back when I decided to get control of the worst of the habits. It's not just that it seemed ridiculous to them that someone like me would get actually "addicted" to something like this. To people who have never felt the compulsion, or the rush of shopping, it's virtually impossible to understand. It's hard for me to admit to all of this. I feel downright ashamed to have let myself get sucked in to something that is so contrary to my values, that feels so superficial. Ultimately though, I have to face my issues to deal with them, so here I am coming out of the closet. I took this picture of Bird's closet to show my recovery board how far I'd come, and how proud I was of how much I had "purged". A year later, the closet is about half as full. I don't want my kids to grow up thinking that they have to have dozens of outfits to be happy. I don't want them to think that that's normal. I want them to feel blessed that they have enough, but I don't want them to feel entitled to more than they need.

My Little Sprout is 5!

My Little Sprout turned Five today. Five years ago, Five seemed so far away, and so big! Thank goodness that somehow time manages to move us right along with them. He really is a big kid though, so polite, so smart, and such a charmer. Everyone who wished Sprout a Happy Birthday today got a "Happy Birthday!" right back! Unfortunately he didn't have many visitors today, due to getting his first ear infection one day shy of his first birthday.

This was a result of 5 days of this terrible, horrible virus we all have this week (with the exception of Beo-stay strong!). Tonight I finally caved and went to urgent care. I have a sinus infection and bronchitis and appear to be fighting off pneumonia. Tonight I completely lost my voice--completely. I have codiene in me now and am looking forward to passing out. Note: Forgive my slow blog, but it's going to be slow for a while yet. At least it's not a video blog. I'd have to hold up cue cards or something!

With what we had to work with, it was a darn good day. We even had a Carrotosaurus Cake. (Yes, I know it kind of looks like DinoMummy, but though I managed to make a cake from scratch, I didn't have the energy to decorate with the five different tips that the Wilton instructions prescribed!) I do not know why, but Sprout, the notoriusly picky eater requests carrot cakes for his birthday. I think it might just be the cream cheese frosting. My Little One turned five and I survived!

Good Food

I've been reflecting on how I came to be a foodie as well as my weight loss success, and I've finally realized that the two are intertwined. The two are not mutually exclusive, and have their own roots, but they ended up working together. I was leaning towards a love of good food before, and my interest in eating more locally and even more whole and organic foods was the foundation for my inner Foodie. My weight loss would have been impossible without my determination and desire to succeed. As I was talking to my Mom tonight I made the connection. When I realized that I had to eat less food, and had to really slow down and enjoy the food that I could eat, I started putting more time and energy into making sure that that food was the best it could be. It needed to be delicious, appealing, and also healthy and nutrient packed so that I could maximize its benefits. I think my love of well prepared good whole foods, and willingness to learn how to and take time to prepare those foods on my own, is actually what helped me achieve the weight loss and maintain it. I think that both my love of good food and my health will continue to support eachother as I continue to move forward. It makes me wonder what America's health could look like if the slow and local food movements could gain more momentum and popularity in the population at large. (No pun intended.) I plan to keep this in mind as I keep exploring the difference I can make.

Milestones

Well, this is it. My last blog as a 20-something. Turning 30 isn't difficult or depressing for me. I think the thirties are fantastic. 29 was the hard birthday for me, it's when I knew 30 was coming and I think I got my apprehension out then. I spent the last year looking forward to 30. Today though, I was really struck at the milestones--the last time I'll wake up in my 20s, the last time I'll give the kids a bath in my 20s, the last time I will cook a meal in my 20s. I even asked Beo to take a picture of it. It was a good one: Mollie Katzen's Samosas. They were a flashback to a wonderful first that I celebrated this past weekend: my first girl's weekend, and I couldn't have celebrated it with better folks. I got to hang out with my beloved Virtual Veggie girls in Kansas City. It was quite a treat! I don't know if it's just that this is the first change in decade that I am mature enough to truly consider and appreciate, or it it's that I really feel like this one is the real transition to adulthood, but either was, I do feel it's a momentous occasion. After all, after this post, I'll be changing the heading on my blog so that it will no longer read "not-quite" 30. Since this is one of those years that my birthday falls on Thanksgiving, I'm especially struck at how thankful I am for my past 30 years--what a wonderful family I was raised in, what an incredible husband I have, what a great family I married in to, and what an amazing family I'm raising. I'm looking forward to the next 30 getting more and more spectactular.

Catalogical

My degree is in Anthropology, and my related studies delved into archaeology as well. My favorite study in that field was that of pseudoscience and pseudoarchaeology. The "scientists" who say that certain Inca carvings show that they had space travel and communicated with aliens; that the Mayan pyramids prove that the Egyptians sailed the ocean long before common science says humans did, and taught them how to build pyramids. While some of it sounds silly, there's plenty of pseudoscience that's quite damaging, that people believe wholeheartedly, such as the "science" behind many Creationist arguments. I digress. When one of my favorite professors was introducing us to the subject, we read two 'articles'. One described an archaeological site found 2000 years from the present. It was thought to reveal a ritual site at which some highly socially ranked individual was making a sacrifice. Of course it was obvious to us that it was a frat boy hugging a toilet. The second article purported to use mathmetical equations to show that if everyone kept saving their issues of National Geographic, the earth would eventually not be able to stand the added volume, and there would be grave consequences. I wish I could find the joke-article, so I could remember what all was going to happen. A change in the gravitational pull of the earth? Tidal waves, earthquakes, eventual collapse? I want to know, because I'm afraid it might happen--not with National Geographic magazines, but catalogs.

I don't know where they all come from. Some I have actually ordered from, and they're fine. Others I've ordered from and I get two or three catalogs from because they have my name misspelled or un-hyphenated, etc. Others seem to think that they need to send me a catalog every week in case I've lost mine. Some are connected behind the scenes. I order from a toy catalog and come to find out that the clothing catalog and home furnishing catalog I receive are owned by the same company. I would have to guess at where all of the liberal catalogs got my name--there are plenty of suspects. I'd like to know who sold my name to Pottery Barn, Pier One, L.L. Bean, Land's End, and a myriad of home furnishing catalogs, which started showing up in our mailbox shortly after moving into a new subdivision. The mortgage company? The home builders? Who was it? Regardless, I'm receiving about a dozen catalogs every day now. I go through the rigamole role of sorting through them, making piles of "Might Order From", "Approved and Just Like to Look at", "Already Unsubscribed", "Must Unsubscribe". I can only handle 2-3 removal requests at a time. I have to jump through hoops, and the response is always that catalogs are pre-printed, and I'll receive 2-3 more catalogs before they stop. Just enough to get me through the holiday season I suspect. So far I've resisted giving in too much to the advertising aspect of it. Even with "Free Shipping!" and "$10 off your $65 order!" I've remained fiscally solvent, which is quite an accomplishment for me.

Besides the advertising being shoved into my mailbox, the environmental aspect bothers me immensely. There are only one or two of the two day haul pictured above that are printed on recycled paper. What a waste, to picture the resources that went into that catalog, and that's duplicated across the country. It's shameful. Of course I recycle all of my unwanted catalogs, but I'm nosy and can't help but wonder what my neighbors do with theirs. Do they buy that pig shaped casserole dish, which they never knew they needed so much? Do they suscribe to the wine of the month club? Do they order the Super-Low-Price toys without a second thought to why they're Super-Low-Price? Perhaps scariest of all, do they recycle them? Or do they pile up in the back room, collecting dust, moving towards the day when the piles of sheeted ink will cause Earth's gravitational fields to shift?